Life Lessons 10 Valuable Life Lessons My Husband Taught Me 11:03 AM Just celebrated another milestone in our marriage. This life chapter has brought a lot of changes - not just in my last name. 😏 There are lessons we've learned together as a couple and as individuals. And the valuable life lessons my husband taught me? I believe every marriage needs them.1. My husband taught me that self-worth is non-negotiable. I don't have to tolerate people who are shortchanging me. He showed me that accepting negativity is a disservice to myself. That I need to take care of my health. That I deserve to be pampered. That I can demand higher pay because I'm good at what I do.Tenor2. My husband taught me how to communicate my feelings.Here's the thing. If a child is crying and you tell them to stop, they grow up thinking they're not allowed to be upset, scared, angry, or show their feelings. In their young minds, they believe those feelings are wrong, invalid, or unacceptable. They get the impression that expressing their emotions is wrong, so they suppress them. Even when they reach adulthood and they know better.My husband showed me that all my emotions are valid. I don't have to hide or dismiss them. He created a safe space where I could express them without judgment, and that's been a game-changer for my emotional health.I still have a hard time sharing or expressing them, but he's a patient teacher (whose patience I always test in that regard 😅).Parks and Recreation3. My husband taught me to trust. Past hurts had me guarding my heart like a dragon guarding its treasure. But my husband's unwavering honesty and genuine actions chipped away at those walls, building trust along the way. He proved that not everyone's out to hurt, humiliate, or use me. I don't always agree with what he tells me, but he's repeatedly proven to me that he's right, so I've learned to trust his judgment.Tenor4. My husband taught me that it's okay to set boundaries.He showed me that I can walk away from people regardless of who they are or their role in my life. If they're sucking out my time and energy or disrespecting me, they're out. Self-love should always be a priority.GifDB5. My husband taught me to celebrate my individuality.I'm an introvert, and all my life, I've been made to believe that how I behave is boring and, well, not normal. Because I prefer quiet and solitude at a time when my peers love to party and be out there. So I forced myself to be where the crowd was, mingle, and be as loud as the others. It drained me. It also made me doubt myself and dislike myself for who I am because I thought I wasn't cool or good enough to be accepted. My husband is the most extroverted person I've met. He respects my need for solitude and doesn't force me into uncomfortable situations. The Odyssey Online6. My husband taught me to redefine stereotypes.Growing up in our culture, I was bombarded with outdated gender roles. My husband, a modern-day man, shattered those expectations. He treats me as a wife AND someone with feelings, needs, and opinions. My husband and I are one, but I still get to keep my identity and make choices for my body. I don't have to conform to what society or tradition dictates, and he's there to support me on that.Tenor7. My husband taught me how to be a partner.Maybe it's because I'm a middle child in a large brood. I've not been a leader. I'm not someone people turn to for opinions. So, I had no idea how to run a ship, so to speak. Marriage, as my husband taught me, is all about teamwork. Healthy relationships require two people working together, not against each other through rough waters.You can't just take orders or take over. We navigate challenges together, celebrate victories as a unit, and share responsibilities with open communication.Giphy8. My husband taught me that the 'mundane' matters.The simple, everyday little things matter, like taking the trash out without being asked or preparing my breakfast while he lets me sleep in. An elaborate bouquet of flowers is lovely, but the flowers he picked from the road on his way home are just as meaningful. Tenor9. My husband taught me the real meaning of intimacy.Speaking your partner's love language is intimacy. Whether you're sitting silently together doing separate things, wrapped up in each other's arms, or hundreds of miles apart, you can get intimate. Because intimacy with someone is a choice that goes beyond the bedroom walls.Leightum10. My husband taught me to be more patient.Because are you really a husband if you're not annoying your wife? 😄 My husband is far from perfect, just like me. He makes mistakes, gets grumpy sometimes, and we don't always see eye-to-eye. We came from very different backgrounds and cultures and had opposing opinions. I've learned to be more patient because I can see him trying to be better. And I know what he does is for the best.[I admit I need to work on this more - especially when I'm being hormonal because that's when I'm not in the mood to cut him some slack. 🤷]TenorValuable Life Lessons My Husband Taught MeMarriage isn't just about fancy rings and cake-cutting ceremonies. Those moments are magical, but the real magic unfolds in everyday, quiet moments and unexpected life lessons learned. And my amazing husband has been a great teacher on this journey.Happy anniversary to my better half. I'm blessed to do life with you. Cheers to more years of love, sunsets, dirty jokes, and flirty pickup lines! 🥂Question for YouWhat life lessons has your partner or relationships taught you? Or do you have any marriage advice?
Listicle 17 Things I Love About My Husband 2:00 PM I want to honor my better half as we celebrate our wedding anniversary. Allow me to share 17 things I love about my husband. 17 reasons why I'm thankful to have him as my life partner.17 Things I Love About My Husband1. He is patient.Marriage is a big adjustment, from deciding on everything by myself to sharing my life with someone.Our cultural differences also make it difficult for us to understand each other.Despite our contrasting personalities and shortcomings, my husband is patient with me. I love that about him.2. He's responsible. My husband sees I don't have to worry about things around the house. He ensures we are comfortable, from fixing leaks to running errands. He takes care of and provides for our needs. I love that he has the initiative to take out the trash without being asked. He doesn't put off until later what needs to be done at the moment.3. He makes me laugh. I love it when he does silly things to give me a little break from working. He shares amusing stories to help keep my stress level down.4. He's smart. He thinks like an engineer; he's math-savvy, inquisitive, methodical, and systematic. My husband is perceptive, thorough, logical, and analytical.He's an eloquent speaker, and I couldn't be prouder.5. He's loyal. When my husband finds a good restaurant, we return to that place, order the same food, and even sit at the same table whenever possible. He asks for the same hairstylist, masseuse, and driver whenever he needs their service.Most of all, he is loyal to me. 6. He makes me feel at peace.Because I know that no matter what happens, he will take care of me, fight for our relationship, and never hurt me intentionally.I know how it is to be in a relationship without your partner's loyalty. Or when there's always a conflict to work on.You're always on edge. I appreciate not having to worry about these things anymore.7. He is thoughtful.My husband always thinks about me and my needs, no matter how busy he gets. He knows my language of love gifts, so he sees that I receive a gift, even if it's just a flower he's picked on his way home.8. He puts Christ first.When I was single, someone said, "Find a man who puts God first and your second. He will not look for a third."I don't mind being my husband's second priority as long as God is his first. As it is, marriage is a covenant between you, God, and your partner. 9. He wants me to take care of myself.My husband always reminds me to pamper myself. He's also willing and eager to wait while I get my hair and nails done.I love that he doesn't just follow me when I shop. Instead, I can ask for his opinion, and he'll give me honest feedback and suitable suggestions.10. He's humble. Our marriage is not perfect, but he's willing to change his ways to improve.Being the leader in our relationship, he's humble enough to apologize first - even when sometimes I'm at fault. 😛11. He's romantic.My husband is my most loving, caring, and romantic partner. He can make me feel special and loved even in ordinary times. He makes me feel like I'm the most beautiful woman in the world, even when I don't think at my best.12. He's selfless.He puts my needs and comfort first before his. Yet, I am included in all his dreams and plans.13. He's clean.My husband takes hygiene seriously. He smells fresh and is always clean. We don't have a messy house; he cleans the kitchen even before eating (unlike me, I wait until we're done before I wash the dishes), and most of all, we always sleep with clean sheets. I can't imagine living with a sloppy person. I'm glad my husband isn't one.15. He has no vices.My husband doesn't smoke and has not had alcohol for a decade. He doesn't gamble, and he has no bad habits.He loves watching movies so much that I could say that's his only "vice," but I get to binge-watch with him sometimes, so all good. 16. He's the best travel companion ever.I love finding the best travel planner and partner I could ever ask for. From making sure we get the best deal without compromising comfort and safety, planning our itinerary, and packing our travel needs, he's on top of things.On the day of the trip, from waking me up (forcing me out of bed, really lol), preparing our breakfast and bags, securing our house, carrying my luggage, and ensuring that we enjoy the trip, I can rely on him.Can't wait to travel with him again.17. He's an excellent life companion. There are days when I need my space, and he respects that. We can sit in silence comfortably or talk endlessly ---mainly depending on my mood. 😁Why I love my husbandMy husband and I couldn't be more different. I can multitask, but he needs to focus on one thing. As all men do, I think.I'm 99% introverted (according to the personality test we took), and he's a full-blown extrovert.Yet I know we can turn our differences into delight.I prayed for a good partner, and God gave me more than I asked for. My husband is another reason I love my life and consider myself blessed.I love my husband because he could be my best friend, most trusted confidant, most supportive cheerleader, and worst critic. I love many things about my husband and am excited to discover more in the coming years.Happy anniversary, Honey! 😘
Marriage How To Change Name After Marriage In The Philippines 9:58 PM After the stress and bliss of wedding preps and the wedding day itself comes a new challenge for the new missus: how to change name after marriage. In the Philippines (and many other countries), it's not required to change your maiden name. I want to write about how I changed my last name after marriage because I know it could be confusing and overwhelming without guidance. It's really not. But since we're talking about government offices in the Philippines, expect that it could take a loooong time to accomplish everything. Let me share the process (as of April 2019) with commentaries, tips and rants here and there. Sorry can't help it. How to Change Name after Marriage in the Philippines First off, make sure you have a copy of your marriage certificate from PSA (Philippine Statistics Authority) or formerly known as NSO (National Statistics Office). Here's a tip (that I wish someone told be beforehand): Get at least 5-6 copies of your marriage certificate to avoid argument with the spouse. 😅 Some agencies will need to keep the original. The Mister begrudgingly went back to request two more copies but we later realized that it might not be enough to have only three. So after much stressful exchange of commentaries 😂 (welcome to married life), we agreed we should have bought 6. The stress comes from knowing how much people are lining up at the PSA every day, and how early you need to be there because...lines!Another tip: It's better to go to the PSA in the afternoon the day before a national holiday. People are usually on their way somewhere for a long weekend or extra day off. My husband at PSA I've never been a fan of going to government offices because of really bad traumatizing experiences in the past. But, we don't really have a choice, do we? I'd like to clarify that I'm currently based in Bacolod and though requirements listed here may be the same nationwide, the processes (like which window, building, etc.) may differ. For Philhealth, we went to their main office (map below). They're also in Robinson's. For PRC, SSS and PAG-IBIG, we went to Robinson's Bacolod 3/F. If you have the time, it's better to go to their main offices. The lines there may be shorter. I will post about change name in passport too once I'm done. PHILHEALTHRequirements: Marriage Certificate original and photocopy (In my case, she didn't bother checking the original and gave it back to me but kept the photocopy). Photocopy of valid government ID (with maiden name is fine). Printed and filled out PMRF (Philhealth Member Registration Form) that you can download from their website. Their site is often down so just check the link if it works. You can also ask in the office directly if you don't want to download. Or send me a message here and I will forward it to you. 1x1 ID picture with white background. This one's not listed on the website, but you need it for your new ID. Steps:Fill out necessary information that applies. For Purpose, tick off ✔ For Updating. Wait for your number to be called and submit all requirements for checking.Wait for your updated record and ID.Comments:That's it.Philhealth office is my favorite so far. We arrived a little past 7 am. I asked the guard for a number and I was #27. They let us in around 7:40 am (their office hours is 8 am to 5 pm) and started transactions right away. By around 8:15 am, my number was called and in less that a minute I was done! See? That's why it's my favorite. I didn't know that I could get an updated ID right then and there though so I had to go out for 1x1 rush ID picture nearby, and went back to request. But again, it took less than a minute. I think maybe 20 seconds. She just printed my name and pasted my picture. You have to have your ID laminated yourself to protect it from damage. There's a lamination service just outside their office. Philhealth office location: Click photo to view on Google Maps PRCRequirements: Filled out Petition Form from their website Photocopy AND original Marriage Certificate Photocopy of old PRC ID Statutory fee of Php 225 Metered documentary stamp 2 pcs passport size picture with white background and name tag (your married name) PRC postal envelope - this is not listed on the website but required in Bacolod which I think is because they will mail your requirements to Manila office.Steps with comments 1. Proceed to Window 1 with requirements 1-3 above. It kind of pissed me off that I made an effort to look for a lawyer to notarize the petition form because that's what it says on their website, only to be told I didn't have to. 😠 I told Miss Not-So-Pleasant at Window 1 that it's what the website says. I even showed the list I downloaded but Miss Window #1 just said, "No, we don't require that. We don't ask you to do that." Cute. 🙄 2. Proceed to the back of the room where you will have your passport size picture taken (they have blazers if you're not wearing top with collar). They only needed one photo but you'll get 6 copies. This is also where you will pay for the stamps. I paid Php 110 for 2 pieces documentary stamps (which the woman wrote on a piece of paper, not an official receipt), Php 120 for the pictures and Php 25 for the postal envelope. The pictures and envelopes were not written on the paper nor was I given an official receipt for these requirements but I didn't ask why anymore because welcome to the Philippines. 😅 3. Back to Window 1. She pasted the stamps and my picture on the form, wrote some things and gave me back my documents. 4. Pay for the statutory fee in Window 5 (Cashier). No sarcasm, she was nice and helpful. You need a number for this though. You can get from the Cashier after you're done with the requirements but my husband got me a number while I was processing. The cashier already called my number but this good guy in front of the line allowed me to go before him because I said I had to wait for my photo (I did for about 5 minutes because it's quite busy). Bless his heart. They'll give you an official receipt for the Statutory Fee. 5. Proceed to Window 6. Brace yourselves. Major rant is coming. Again, a little annoying because Mr. Window 6 (Brian) was pointing at the notary on my paper to his colleague and sniggering. He did this not only once but 3x because his colleague (Miss Nice and Helpful Cashier) didn't find it amusing that he was acting like a total jerk, pointing at my "mistake" in front of me for having my paper notarized. So I told him, "Your website says notarized Petition Form." 😈 To which he replied that it's only for blah blah blah process. I didn't catch what he said. But he meant it's for something else. It's time to update your website and specify which transaction needs a notarized petition form and which doesn't, PRC. We're professionals, we're not mind readers. And train your employees (or at least Sir Brian at Window 6) to act professionally next time. The P on your agency's name means Professional after all. 🙄 I went back to the woman who sold me the postal envelope for a refund because I said it's not required apparently. But then she said, they should've taken it and called the trooper Sir Brian. He forgot he needed to file it with my papers. He's such a delight! 🙄 Giphy Note: I was instructed to check online (within 2-8 months) if my record has been amended. After that, I have an option to apply for online transaction like I'm applying for renewal of license or just wait for when my present ID will expire. They will then give me an ID with "Duplicate" on it (if I'll apply for renewal right away), reflecting the same expiration date as I have on my current ID. Depending on the number of people applying on the day, transaction may be quick or slow. I think we were there for only about 40 mins.PRC Location:I went to PRC Robinson's Bacolod. The mall wasn't open yet but if you tell the guard your purpose, they'll let you in. SSSRequirements: Two (2) copies of Member Data Change Request Marriage Certificate (must show the original but only leave photocopy) Old SSS ID Photocopy of valid ID with married name Steps:Line up to have your forms checked and get a number. So if you'll ask me, it's better to download the form online so you can fall in line right away. Wait (for eternity 😅) for your number to be called and submit your requirements.Note: I was also told to put my husband under Dependent because apparently, that's automatic when you're married. I didn't know that. They will send your new SSS ID via mail within 30-60 days.Comments:This one's a pain. Although I'm thankful that Robinson's has Lingkod Pinoy Centers where you can find government offices in one place, the lines could be daunting. This took more than two hours of waiting. 🚩 Update: I never got my SSS ID. It was lost in the mail, the post office told me. They advised me to just get a new one. That was more 2 hours wasted including me going back. 🤬 PAGIBIGRequirements: Marriage Certificate (they didn't look for original, just photocopy) MCIF (Member's Change of Information Form) Valid government ID (it's on the list but they didn't ask for mine) Steps:Get a number.Wait for another eternity. 😭😅 Wait for your number to be called and submit all your documents. They will update your information immediately but you'll have to go back for the form with your updated married name. They'll tell you when. For me it's three days after. Tip: Get numbers for both SSS and PAGIBIG at the same time. They're just next to each other. PAGIBIG is a little faster than SSS but in total it still took maybe almost four (4) hours for both transactions to be finished. Giphy Changing name is no fun but it is necessary. It's part of making things legal. Remember to bring with you: black pen some snacks or candy to avoid getting hAngry water a fan (it was hot even with the mall's AC) a whole lot of patience and understanding for uncultured people like Brian at the PRC office 🙊 Hope this helps! If you have further questions, please leave a comment below. What's your experience in changing your name after marriage? Let me know!
Lux Thinking Aloud I Have Found The One Whom My Soul Loves - My Wedding Day 6:38 PM I have found the one whom my soul loves. - Song of Solomon 3:4 It seems only yesterday when I was writing about why I was single.People I know and even I myself was a little surprised as to how fate made an unexpected turn.Today, I'm sharing the day God fulfilled His promise to me...The day I have found the one whom my soul loves...my wedding day!I Have Found the One Whom My Soul Loves The WaitingEven when I had unsuccessful past relationships, my faith in love was never tarnished. I knew it was going to be a long journey so I decided to enjoy it. I kept working on myself and I waited---sometimes in faith, sometimes in fear. There were days when I was blissfully reveling in my unattached and uncomplicated single life...And there were nights when my heart would long for a partner. I already had plans of living alone yet I felt a prodding in a different direction. Prayers and Discernment Interestingly, I met my husband when I was resolved that the single life was for me. It was when I fully embraced the thought of staying single forever when God was like, "Wait! I've got a better plan." Every night I would ask God if this man I met is the one because otherwise, I don't want to waste my time. It's funny that I used to ask for specific things I want for my future spouse, and when I met someone who checked all the boxes, I was in doubt. There are a lot of prayers from me and my friends involved.It's going to be a major life change so I need all the spiritual guidance I could get.My husband on the other hand had been praying for years for God to finally give him his wife before he turns a certain age.Single friends, remember these two important things while you wait:Write down your non-negotiables for a partner. Be as specific as you can be. Pray. A lot. Our Wedding Day It may seem rushed, but there were a lot of things involved from that fateful day we met to the day we exchanged I do's. It wasn't a perfect wedding, but it was beautiful. The planning and preparations brought me to a whole new level of stress---which unfortunately showed on my skin even on our wedding day. My husband's first words to me when we met at the altar were "You look beautiful, honey." 😊 So I guess it didn't matter how my complexion was. Not all things would go according to your plans. But I've realized that at the end of the day, it's not about that perfect Instagrammable wedding picture. It's not about how much the flowers cost or how gorgeous your wedding dress is (I'm blessed that mine was 😝 and it's unplanned how I found it). Your wedding is a celebration of your union with the person God gave you as a partner. It's about you starting your life with your best friend. It's the day you share your promise to the world. And that's all that really matters. Everything else is supplemental. Here's our wedding video: Dear readers, thank you for journeying with me from when I was single until now. I will still be blogging about being single because I love that stage of my life and I learned a lot from it. My hope is to continue to encourage everyone regardless of their relationship status. And my prayer is that if you haven't yet, may you also find the one whom your soul would love.
