Life Lessons Our Deepest Needs 1:31 AM What are our deepest needs? We know we need food, water and shelter. More than the basic though, we have this deep need. An emptiness that we so often try to fill with shallow things. The emptiness is so painful we grab on to things that can help us numb the pain until such time that we believe we've found what we're looking for. But have we really? I've realized that the unusually excessive desire to have more, to always have the best and the newest gadget, to possess the most expensive accessories, to want to be seen in the coolest place hanging out with people you don't like as long as they make you look cool are nothing but a desire to be accepted, to be wanted, to be loved. Best selling author Bo Sanchez says, "Addiction is nothing but a hunger for love." We grow up with empty love tanks and when the people around us; our family, our friends, our community, fail to fill us with love, we look somewhere else to feed this hunger for love. We look for attention, affirmation, assurance. We long for something that material things can never satisfy. Everyone, no matter how tough they pretend to be, needs love. Unless we realize this, unless we start filling ourselves up with the right things, throw away the garbage that we accumulated in the hopes of covering our scars of rejection and emptiness; unless we search and chase genuine love, we will be like zombies. Walking aimlessly, looking for something that can satiate our longing, not knowing what it is for as long as we don't feel hungry and in pain. We will continue to be miserable unless we scrape away the layers of our shallowness and dig deeper for what we truly need. Cliche maybe, but all we really need is love. Go back to About Life and Love Homepage
Lux Thinking Aloud 2014 Is A Year Of More 12:19 AM 2014 Is A Year Of More My 2014 is going to be a year of "more". Yes, I am pressuring myself to do more and be more. I'm not gonna be sadistic though. I will be lenient on the details. This 2014, I will read more books. This 2014, I will try more things. In the list: bake (cupcake), target shooting, travel alone. This 2014, I will visit more places. This 2014, I will try more food. This is a bit of a challenge for me because I'm a picky eater. This 2014, I will invest more time on exercise. Diet I can handle but getting physical is another story. So yes, more movements for me. This 2014, I will invest more in the stock market. This 2014, I will say "no" more often to trivial things so I can say "yes" more to important things. Needless to say, this 2014, I will love myself more. More abundance in all areas of my life. More fun and happiness. More adventures. Not to forget, more sleep. So goodnight! Hey, did you find this post helpful or entertaining? Please go ahead and share. Share buttons on the left and at the bottom of the article. Big thanks! Subscribe to About Life And Love by Email
Quotes Money Doesn't Change You, It Only Magnifies Who You Really Are 7:51 PM Money doesn't change you, it only magnifies who you really are. It's not true that money changes people. Money has no control over your emotions. How you react to what is happening around you is your choice. Money problem is a psychological problem. Money will only reveal your true color. The selfish becomes more selfish and the generous becomes more generous with money. The kind becomes kinder and the cruel becomes more cruel. The happy becomes happier and the miserable becomes more miserable. Money can be your friend or your foe. Money is a tool. If used wisely, it can help you live a better life. If you don't know how to utilize it, money can destroy you. Money can be a good servant or a sadistic master. The choice really is in your hands. Two things define you: Your patience when you have nothing and your attitude when you have everything. -George Bernard Shaw Want more quotes? Follow About Life and Love on Instagram
Listicle 13 Reasons Why It's Cool To Be Single At 30 12:22 AM 13 Reasons Why It's Cool to be Single at 30But the thirties are a specially dangerous time for women. They have outlived the shyness and restraints of girlhood, and not attained to the caution and discretion of middle age. They are reckless, and consciously or unconsciously on the lookout for adventure. They see ahead of them the end of youth, and that quickens their pace. -Rose Macaulay People get depressed when they turn a year older, and they're still single because they feel they're doomed to be lonely. But, let me tell you---you're cool! I really do think so. Here are 13 reasons why:1. Financial freedom You earn your own money, and you can spend it anyway you want without having someone to answer to. No parents to interrogate you, no spouse or children yet to consider. 2. Own your time No curfew. No one to tell you what time you need to be home, or what time you should be waking up. You sleep whenever you wish. 3. You decide for yourself. You make your own decisions, no matter how big or trivial it may be. Your parents can give you advice and you may ask your friends' opinion, but it's still your call. 4. More comfortable You're more comfortable now in your own skin. No more "Ugh, I feel so awkward" trying to figure out what you want phase. You can change hairstyles and don't give a damn what people might say as long as you feel good about it. You can choose clothes that are comfortable (and stylish) to wear, not the clothes your parents chose for you or what your peers are wearing. You're more confident now with who you are. 5. Boldness You can speak your mind, and you're not scared to be misjudged. You no longer worry about what people might think about your opinions or if they will take it against you. 6. You've had enough You don’t put up with other people’s crap anymore. If it doesn’t make you happyearn more moneygrowyou can simply leave it. Your time is more valuable to spend on meaningless things or people who don’t nourish you. 7. Free to "adult" The freedom to watch adult films, go to places exclusive for adults and not faking your age, feeling guilty or mortified about it. 8. You know better.You met almost all kinds of people. You’ve heard a lot of crazy crap. You’ve been through hell and back that you feel as though you can take anything life will throw at you.You are learned and enlightened. You may not have figured everything yet (who does anyway?) but wiser than you were back when you were at your 20’s. 9. Richer You’re definitely richer now than you were before. Wealthier in terms of money (that is if you have saved and invested well enough years before), healthier (if you’ve been taking care of your body) and wealthier in experience and friends. 10. Smarter You understand and appreciate the essence of compounding interest. You used to hear Greek whenever you come across that word and when someone tries to explain it to you. Now, you feel a natural connection with that phrase, and you know that it’s a friend not a foe.You may make the wrong choices from time to time but you're (hopefully) making better decisions than you used to. 11. 2nd chances It’s never too late to be what you want to be because now you have the resources and the time in the world to pursue your long overdue dream. You are your own priority now. 12. Choosing your own battle You know which battles to pick; which ones you need to continue fighting, surrender or ignore. 13. Paint anything! You have a blank canvass of life. Though you’re in your mid-life now, you still can have a brand new start. 30 and still single? Hey, you're cool! Shared on Thought CatalogGifs from Giphy
Listicle The Housemates From Hell 8:00 AM If you're sharing a space with other people, you'll meet some who will become your friends---BFFs even. Chances are, you'll also meet those who will push you over the edge. Meet... The Housemates from Hell The Freeloader They presume that because you share things, everything's free. So your toiletry, food, and whatnot are not exclusively yours. Solution: keep all your things in a closet and lock it. The Inconsiderate They don't understand that sleeping is an essential part of your life. So they talk as loud as the next door neighbor could hear, they watch T.V. or turn the radio on max volume, they turn on the lights, and they proceed with their lives oblivious of your need for rest. Since I'm very mature and patient, I suggest you give them a dose of their own medicine. *wink* When it's their turn to sleep, turn the lights on, turn the T.V.'s volume up, and move as noisily as you can. Of course in the end, they'd accuse you of being inconsiderate. How could you not let them rest? The inconsiderate housemates are also one-sided...and oftentimes, they can't be taught. Because things like common courtesy should come as naturally as common sense. Solution: Leave. You can never beat them, and you should never join them. The Always Broke They tell you they don't have enough money to pay the rent but you see them buy and hoard useless things. They will even have the gall to borrow money from you despite you knowing how they manage their finances. Solution: Don't lend. The Kleptomaniac This is probably the worst and somehow the most common kind of housemate you will encounter. There's always one in every 3 housemate horror stories. They will take not only your money or valuables, but your other personal belongings. A Freeloader who went seriously overboard and is actually committing a crime. The Sex God/Goddess The housemate who brings different random partners basically turning your house into a brothel. The annoying part is that you split the bills equally, but they act as though they own the place; bringing anyone anytime without your consent and doing whatever they want. An obnoxious variation of the Inconsiderate. Someone you cannot teach respect to, because it's just not their thing. The Gossip Girls or Friends Turned Foes Most of the time, these are the housemates you are friends with. That is, before you notice the conversation either abruptly stops or is redirected to other topics when you arrive, before the whispering starts, and the hostility becomes obvious. Could be triggered by your solution in #2. Also, you make plans together (as friends) and they proceed with the plan without you...with no explanation. You just have to figure out if you missed anything in the details. Or stop trying to salvage your friendship and leave. The Bipolar Sometimes you get along, sometimes they hate the world, sometimes you don't exist. Everyday is an adventure. I have had housemates since college until recently. I've met different kinds of individuals. Some interesting, others downright annoying. Most of them possess traits and quirks unimaginable. You'll meet the extremes, but along the way, you'll also form lasting friendship with some really good ones. Living with strangers under one roof is the fastest way to learn how diverse and crazy the world is. You'll also discover your own craziness. They'll test your patience, leave you with fun memories and like it or not, change your life forever (Click image to view in full size) Photos and gifs: Google images Other kinds of housemates: Hey, did you find this post helpful or entertaining? Please go ahead and share. Share buttons on the left and at the bottom of the article. Big thanks! Subscribe to About Life And Love by Email
Music Music: Brave (Sara Bareilles) 6:04 PM Brave by Sara Bareilles is on top of my favorite pick-me-up songs. Enjoy this video and have a braver year, everyone! Brave (Sara Bareilles) You can be amazing You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug You can be the outcast Or be the backlash of somebody’s lack of love Or you can start speaking up Nothing’s gonna hurt you the way that words do When they settle ‘neath your skin Kept on the inside and no sunlight Sometimes a shadow wins But I wonder what would happen if you Say what you wanna say And let the words fall out Honestly I wanna see you be brave With what you want to say And let the words fall out Honestly I wanna see you be brave I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I wanna see you be brave I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I wanna see you be brave Everybody’s been there, Everybody’s been stared down by the enemy Fallen for the fear And done some disappearing, Bow down to the mighty Don’t run, just stop holding your tongue Maybe there’s a way out of the cage where you live Maybe one of these days you can let the light in Show me how big your brave is Say what you wanna say And let the words fall out Honestly I wanna see you be brave With what you want to say And let the words fall out Honestly I wanna see you be brave And since your history of silence Won’t do you any good, Did you think it would? Let your words be anything but empty Why don’t you tell them the truth? Say what you wanna say And let the words fall out Honestly I wanna see you be brave With what you want to say And let the words fall out Honestly I wanna see you be brave I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I wanna see you be brave I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you See you be brave I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you I just wanna see you
Quotes Indifference Because Some People Do Not Deserve Your Emotions 11:04 PM Indifference.in·dif·fer·ence/inˈdif(É™)rÉ™ns/noun: lack of interest, concern, or sympathy. Some people do not deserve your emotions. Some people are not worth your time and feelings. There are those you can refer to as vampires because being around them suck the life out of you: Toxic people. Users. Naysayers. Emotionally immature. It is not your obligation to adjust to them. Don't burden yourself. Life's too short to surround yourself with those who do not appreciate you, respect you or value you. You're not put on earth to suffer for others. You can only help them up to a point. They get to decide if they're going to help themselves or not. Don't waste your energy and your time on those who do not contribute to your well-being. Sometimes it's better to show indifference. Because some people do not deserve your emotions. Want more quotes? Follow About Life and Love on Instagram
Life Lessons Things To Leave In 2013 5:39 PM You can't cling to the past, because no matter how tightly you hold on, it's already gone. -How I Met Your Mother I got inspired to write my own list of things to leave in 2013, when I saw Mandy Hale's post. I love her! Things To Leave in 2013 Fake friends Yes, there are people whom you can say are really good to you, they were there when you needed them the most and when you've got nothing, and friends you can share good times with. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way, they started to distance themselves from you and your woman instinct kicks in and tells you something's wrong. You know because the conversation started to become casual and the topics limited (they keep you in the dark), the warm welcome turned cold and you hear them whisper and exchange knowing looks when they thought you're not aware. Needless to say, to continue the friendship is like trying to wear the clothes you've outgrown. No matter how much you like it, it just doesn't fit anymore. It's time to leave. So leave, you must. Toxic and petty people You don't have to hang out with the wrong crowd. Jesus may have succeeded in converting what the society considered as outcasts but let's face it. In real life, more often than not, the more you try to fix people, the more they destroy you. I've noticed that the more I try to reach out to difficult people, try to understand them and make their lives better, the more disappointed and exhausted I become. Bo Sanchez said you may love difficult people from a distance, but you don't have to spend time with them. They will just suck your energy out and leave you drained. Bitterness Bitterness leaves you feeling bad about yourself, makes you overlook the blessings around you and makes you wish ill towards another. There's no sense in feeling bitter about the past because it's over. And as appealing as plotting your vindication is, only God can really give you back what you've lost. Unforgiveness Life is too short to spend hating. Unforgiveness is like drinking poison while waiting for the other person to die". It will harm your body and spirit and will steal your joy. Worry Worrying over baseless things. Worry is another huge "joy-stealer". Instead of worrying, spend your time and energy wishing (and planning). Even the Bible keeps on reminding us that we need not worry. We just need to trust. Unproductive hobbies Habits and activities that do not nourish. It takes 28 days to form a habit. So you need to be patient with yourself. You have to take it one day at a time. Start getting a healthy sleeping pattern, stop munching on unhealthy food, stop engaging in gossips. These are just a few unnecessary habits that we must not bring with us in the next year. Easier said than done, but not impossible to do. Could-have-been It's never too late to be who you might have been. Yes, there are words better left unspoken. There are things we wished we could have done better. But, if it's over, let it go. The best way to avoid regrets is to start acting now and be what you've always wished to be or do what you've always wanted to do. Every new day is an opportunity to start over. Fears and what if's The only person stopping you is yourself. Do it afraid. Unnecessary spending. Do something today that your future self will thank you for---save and invest. Your past Obviously. Leave 2013 to 2013 and welcome 2014 with open arms. What are you leaving in 2013? Hey, did you find this post helpful or entertaining? Please go ahead and share. Share buttons on the left and at the bottom of the article. Big thanks! Subscribe to About Life And Love by Email
Lux Thinking Aloud My 2013 In A Nutshell 3:31 PM My 2013 in a nutshell: My 2013 has been a year full of twists, wonderful surprises and rediscoveries. My 2013 has been a year of meeting a lot of new people, reconnecting with old friends and reluctantly leaving a few behind. My 2013 has been a year of finding courage to leave what's not nourishing me, what's not making me happy anymore and what's holding me back. My 2013 has been a year of acceptance; I've stopped chasing things and people not worth my time and effort. My 2013 has been a year of boldness, of speaking up and not putting up with other people's sh*t. My 2013 has been a year of healing, emerging not as a perfect person but definitely an improved version of myself. My 2013 has been a year of humility; learning continuously and accepting the fact that I'm no better than anyone else. My 2013 has been a year of service and a little sacrifice that came with it. My 2013 has been a year of taking my health seriously (working out and being picky with what I eat), spending more wisely, trying out new things and going to places I've never been to before. My 2013 has been a year that made me feel more human and I daresay, more complete. My 2013 is the year I found, liked and fell in love with myself all over again. And, I declare that my 2014 can only be better. Hey, did you find this post helpful or entertaining? Please go ahead and share. Share buttons on the left and at the bottom of the article. Big thanks! Subscribe to About Life And Love by Email
Rants Just So You Know 12:57 PM When a woman is quiet it’s not because she doesn't know what to answer and you’re winning. She’s contemplating whether she should say what she thinks or if she’ll just let you think you're really smart and awesome you've left her dumbfounded. Just So You Know When you're still single at the age when "normal" people marry or start a family of their own, people look at you like you're a freak. Sometimes it’s amusing to see the looks on their faces, sometimes it’s flattering when they're surprised to know your age, sometimes it’s downright irritating. Especially when you hear comments from small minded individuals. People who think something’s wrong with you and not for a second think that there must have been a good reason why you chose to stay single instead of panicking like it’s the end of the world and you're doomed because no one’s “put a ring on it” yet. Honestly, I don't know if I'd ever get used to people who were born with a life mission of criticizing every single detail in your life like they're paid to do it. I’m torn between wanting to be a good Christian and unleashing that clawed bitch in me. As always, the good side wins. So I just bite my tongue and force a smile every time. And try with all the strength I could muster to NOT NOT speak my mind when addressing their comments. It’s like there’s this voice inside me saying, “Easy there, tiger. He’s not worth the energy”. So I back away and another poor person’s life has been spared from humiliation and utter harsh verbal combat from moi. When a woman is quiet it’s not because she doesn't know what to answer and you’re winning. She’s contemplating whether she should say what she thinks or if she’ll just let you think you're really smart and awesome you've left her dumbfounded. Just so you know. See also: Ramblings Of An Old Woman
