Faith 7 Stages of Moving On: Back to Wholeness 5:00 PM Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. -Louise Erdrich 7 Stages of Moving On I’ve spent years chasing my dreams, turning my ambitious thoughts into beautiful things. I donned medals of academic rewards, earned certificates that attest to my competencies, obtained the trust of key people in their respective domains of expertise, and conquered worlds that gave me a rightful place. I’ve surpassed seemingly insurmountable challenges and with these, I have learned so much. I resolved that as a dreamer, I would never fall in love. I spent a great deal of conscious effort to guard my feelings because I know it is my greatest weakness. Then it came. Nothing has ever prepared me for this. I fell in love deeply. I’ve been hurt badly. Pain and Denial My heartbreak was like a giant tidal wave that came crushing over me. The whole world collapsed before my eyes. I felt defeated and helpless. Until now, I couldn’t find the exact words to explain the gravity of my pain. All I ever wanted was to make the pain go away...faster! It was very hard for me to see things beyond my pain. There were many questions that I begged answers for and the worst part of it all was that I denied myself of the reality. I convinced myself that my love just needed time and space to think things over and we would be together again. Lost and Shattered As the reality of my broken heart sank in my stricken mind, I found myself in the middle of nowhere. I didn't know how to proceed with my life. I lost my direction. I suddenly stopped doing my routine. I lost interest in the things that I used to find pleasure in. To top it all, I gave up my recent career promotion which resulted to financial difficulties. I wanted to protect myself from further pain so I shut my world, disconnected from life, and lived in darkness. Emotional Paralysis It was the stage when my heart became cold and hard. I was so focused on my pain that I became very insensitive to the needs and feelings of others. I felt lonely. I trusted nobody. I did not allow anyone to comfort me. It was as if the colors of life have faded away. Every comforting word fell on my deaf ears. Bitterness was everything I could taste. Prisoner of the Past I couldn't remember how long have I been a prisoner of the memories that I couldn't let go. I always saw my object of affection in everything I set my eyes on. Even when I closed my eyes, a vision of my beloved haunted me in my dreams. I kept loving this person so much; yet, I wasn’t receiving the treatment that I deserve. I was out of my mind! The Awakening I could still recall those lonely mornings when I wondered what I was waking up to. I dreaded the time between sunrise and sunset because I knew I was going to put up another exhausting battle with my emotions. One time, I happened to see my naked self on the full length mirror. I shuddered at seeing my appearance. This is no longer me! I realized that my life was going nowhere; that I was wasting so much time wallowing with my pain; that I've allowed myself to suffer terribly; that I needed to be kind to myself; that I needed to give myself a chance to be happy! Discernment and Acceptance It’s important to reflect on the desires of our heart before we engage in any relationship. If you're intention is to find someone to “complete” you, then you're setting yourself up to failure. The one you'll find might just be as broken as you are. Two hurt people coming together to find happiness isn’t a good start of a romantic relationship. In my case, at least, this is true. I didn't realize that I was already broken before I even entered the relationship. This is where I’ve gone wrong. It only made sense to me now after I've graciously accepted my pain. It put me to the right perspective that my struggle had a meaning. God allowed things to fall apart so certain family relationships would be restored. My heartbreak led me to rediscover a lot of things about myself, including my faith. I realized that fixing my broken relationship with God is the key to having a happy relationship with people. Relaunching My Spiritual Life When I surrendered my brokenness to God, my path to healing has started. More blessings initially disguised by pain have been unleashed. I'm closer now with my family. I’ve also found a new rewarding career that meets my learning and financial expectations. Sometimes, I think that I'm better off to be just on my own, with my God who truly completes me. About the author: Jayson Santos is a spiritual seeker, a dreamer, and a runner. On his blog, The Dreamer Writes, he devotes a special section called Dear Love, where he writes and collects stories, poems, unsent letters, love notes, and all other messages of joy and sorrow from a heart that faithfully loves.
Faith Enjoy God 6:00 PM Every breathing moment is an experience of God's love. Enjoy God For some religious folks, enjoyment and fun are unholy. They consider any merriment too worldly. Sad. I believe that God invented laughter and humor. Happiness is a gift from Him. He takes delight in us (Zephaniah 3:17). He wants us to be happy. And to be happy does not strip off holiness. Can you imagine God looking down on you filled with joy? I can. I have a brother who sometimes always gets to my nerves because he’s a growing teen. But, whenever he says something funny, or say amazing things for someone his age, and does his chores, I well up with joy and pride. This is the kid I used to baby-sit, bathe, read stories to. Now he can take care of himself, his cousins, his pet dogs, tell me stories about gods and goddesses, and hobbits, and elves that I haven’t heard of, he can play banduria and guitar. He sings well (when he thinks we’re not listening. Hah!) I think that’s how God sees us. He disapproves of our wrongdoings, but we can bring him pride and joy every time. I personally enjoy God when things are going my way. Like any normal emotional human being though, I find it hard to take delight in moments when things are difficult. It’s REALLY hard to thank and praise Him when my cup’s empty. But, I try. I play loud worship songs, I try with all the strength I can gather to say “Thank You” when I’m in the middle of a mess and unsure if I can get through it. It’s hard. What I do to make it a little easier is to remind myself of the times He never failed me in the past; when I thought it’s the end of the road, but it was just a detour, when I thought darkness has no end, but He brought me dawn, when I thought Friday will be forever, but then He gave me Sunday, I couldn’t emphasize it more. It is difficult to enjoy God, especially when you’ve been praying for something for a very long time, and it’s as if He’s not paying attention. What I’ve learned in the waiting, and in the pruning stage is that every situation is an opportunity to pray and praise. In great times, I praise and thank Him. In difficult times, I ask for His comfort and thank Him for honing my faith. In confusing times, I ask for His enlightenment and guidance, and thank Him for the opportunity to be wiser. In lonely times, I seek His embrace, and thank Him for not leaving my side, and for the opportunity to appreciate the value of a company. Every breathing moment is an experience of God's absolute love. May we never forget that. May I not forget that. I was sure by now God You would have reached down And wiped our tears away Stepped in and saved the day But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining As the thunder rolls I barely hear Your whisper through the rain "I'm with you" And as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives And takes away. -Praise You In This Storm, Casting Crowns Hey, did you find this post helpful or entertaining? Please go ahead and share. Share buttons on the left and at the bottom of the article. Big thanks! Subscribe to About Life And Love by Email
Fashion & Style Fashion Rules You Should Break Immediately 6:00 PM Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. -Marilyn Monroe When it comes to fashion, the rules aren't set in stone. That's what makes fashion fun. Here's some words of wisdom and helpful tips from a fashion editor to guide us through breaking fashion rules we've always known and obediently followed: Whoever said living in the world of beauty isn’t hard lied. The truth is, being under constant pressure to look good, dress well, have good manners, be cool but not too cool, stand out but not too much, follow trends but still stay unique can pretty much mess with your head. Are we right? We are, and you know it! Beauty is a wonderful thing, in all aspects of life – on people’s faces, on their clothes, in their minds, in the embrace of their loved ones, and their workstations – there’s probably nothing as stimulating as a brilliant mind dressed in a brilliant ensemble that oozes confidence and vigor. Still, no matter how much we deny it – we are all slaves to what is expected of us, one way or another. So, we say – break a few rules here and there, surprise with unpredictable behavior and daring choices, make decisions nobody would expect you to and dare try something new! If you are looking to switch up your style a bit, we are giving you some ideas on how to do just that. Fashion Rules You Should Break Immediately Sneakers and smart clothes Even though we were thought sneakers should never leave the gym, truth is – they can look pretty cool! Looking sloppy isn’t a prerequisite of giving your feet a break but rather to combining styles not many people would dare to. The trick to making them look awesome on you is to ditch the socks and wear your sneaks with crisp button-down, cropped pants! To add a bit of drama, rely on a coat for a polished look. Not wearing undergarments For long, the stigma of undergarments was a big no-no in the fashion world. However, with the body-con dresses and the hourglass much loved shape, getting the right piece of undergarments is an absolute must! Brands like Leonisa are super hot for quite some time now, so start from there. They are 100% celebrity approved! Navy and black While at first glance not complementary at all, navy and black actually agree so well together! There’s a sort of mystique about these two joined in an outfit, and even more so when they are complementing one another through accessorize like scarves, earrings, hairbands, coats, etc. Make sure you make it look intentional and not as an outfit put together in a dark room where all dark colors are alike. The result of this awesome combo will be a very flattering and slimming combination. Denim on denim Whaaaaat? Of course you’ll start wearing denim on denim, effective immediately! Sure, Britney and Justin in their denim ensemble did leave us with a bitter taste in our mouths but that doesn’t mean we’re still on that! With new fashion icons like Kim Kardashian (and all of her sisters) as well as Hollywood glamazons like Gwen Stefani, Gigi Hadid, Kate Hudson, and plenty others it’s proven that double denim can look amazing! A denim shirt tucked into fitted pencil skirt or cropped jeans make room for a bold statement coat. If you want to avoid the “sameness” of the outfit, try mixing different shades of denim. Not wearing blazers and suits For some reasons, girls have been indoctrinated for years that male-inspired clothes simply aren’t their fit. Ha! Wrong! There’s rarely something as sexy as a girl or a woman in a fitted blazer or a custom made suit that enhances her figure while at the same time keeping her look professional and smart! Wearing faux fur The popular opinion is that faux fur tends to look cheap which is why fashionistas around the world aren’t supporting this trend. However, thanks to all of the fabulous new and very realistic versions we’ve got on shelves, faux fur looks better than ever! On top of that – like you would ever wear a dead animal on your back?! Make your outfit irresistible by opting for a faux fur scarf or collar in a natural color and it will add a special vibe to your single-colored outfit. Gold and silver – never? Ridiculous. These two combine amazingly together. Try it, you won’t regret it! All photos from guest blogger Cristina About the author: Cristina Nika is an aspiring blogger from Sydney. She likes to get lost in the world of fashion, beauty and healthy lifestyle. She has an insight in variety of subjects and has a strong interest in mindful living, drinks excessive amounts of coffee and ginger ale, collects flip-flops and loves to take long walks around Manly beach. Follow Cristina on Twitter. Hey, did you find this post helpful or entertaining? Please go ahead and share. Share buttons on the left and at the bottom of the article. Big thanks! Subscribe to About Life And Love by Email
Dating 10 Possible Reasons Why Women Choose Bad Boys 6:00 PM 10 Possible Reasons Why Women Choose Bad Boys From a third person’s perspective, it may be hard to understand why good women choose bad guys over the nice husband material types. We can psychoanalyze them all day, but here are ten possible reasons why women choose bad boys. This post contains affiliate links, so we’d get a commission if you purchase through the links at no additional cost to you.1. Breaking the rules means fun Women want someone who can break the monotony.They look for a partner to surprise and take them out of mediocrity.They want someone who can give them an adrenaline rush and constantly keep them on their toes. The bad guy is a rule breaker. And the thrill they offer could be a reason women choose bad boys. Giphy 2. Mind conditioning from the mediaThe media conditioned us to believe the rotten apple can still be good.Many movies feature stories about women falling for bad boys who are actually nice. Or turned out to be just a troubled or misunderstood creature. Good Will Hunting is a good example.Women have been exposed to the bad boy turned good scenario even when they’re still little girls.Aladdin was a liar and a thief. But he only does it for survival. Plus, he gives what he has to someone who needs it more.The Beast was mean and kidnapped Belle, but Stockholm syndrome made them fall for each other.There’s character development in the end, so the possibility of a happily ever after for the girl who chooses the bad boy is there.Giphy3. Confidence is sexy Bad boys exude confidence, and confidence is sexy. Nothing is more attractive than a man who knows what he wants and goes for it. It could be because women want security. And a man who seems like he’s sure of himself gives that vibe. Giphy 4. Daddy issues If you’re a fan of How I Met Your Mother, you know that Barney Stinson’s favorite “prey” are women with daddy issues. They want someone precisely the opposite of what their fathers wish for them.Or because of homing instinct. They gravitate to what is familiar or makes them feel at home. So if they’ve been badly treated by the man supposed to love and protect them growing up, they’re attracted to someone who does the same.It’s the kind of relationship or treatment they know and understands.Sad reality. Women may choose bad boys because of their broken relationships with their fathers. Giphy 5. Bad boys are challenging Men love the chase. Women love a good challenge. What challenge?Turning the rebel into the ideal guy.The more the lousy guy rejects them, the more they want to go after them. To prove their worth. To change his mind, perhaps. We can also say that women don’t like the bad boys they see. Instead, they like the idea of being responsible for his transformation into a nice guy. Some women make bad boys their personal projects. A goal to accomplish.Sometimes they give too much of themselves in the hopes of bringing the best out of the person they choose.They allow themselves to become a rehabilitation center for boys with issues.That sense of accomplishment to achieve something that seems impossible is exciting and enticing.Girls choose the bad boys because they love a challenge.Giphy 6. Girls just wanna have fun Men are not the only ones afraid of commitment or settling down. Since nice guys seem to be the marrying type, so some women avoid them. They don’t want to be tied. At least not yet.Bad boys are more carefree and appear more fun to be around. They’re not the type who would settle down anytime soon. Drunkgifs 7. Solving the mystery The bad boy has a story he hides from the world. Who doesn’t love a mystery?The pleasure in uncovering that enigmatic bad boy.Curiosity gets the better of some women. So they choose the elusive bad boy. Giphy 8. The damsel in distress in search of the knight in shining armor According to clinical psychologist Dr. Kanan Khatau Chikhal: “Most of these women who fall for this kind of man are intimidated by the outside world. They are naturally shy and instantly attracted to someone who can take on the world, protect and take care of them.”That sums it all up.Some women need saving from the cruel world. And the dauntless bad boy offers that. Giphy 9. Inferiority complex The lack of self-worth often leads women to believe they deserve to be treated like crap.So they stay even when the guy doesn’t give them the attention, affection, and respect they deserve. Giphy 10. The instinct to care for someone in needUnderneath all the bravado, you’re just a sad little boy with delusions of grandeur… who can’t fence for shit by the way. -Rafe AdlerWomen are naturally sympathetic and are born with maternal instincts. They quickly need to protect and care for those considered as society’s reject or are often picked on. Bad boys look like they need to be loved and nurtured, and women are ready to offer that. GiphyAdmit it. At one point, you want to try something everybody tells you not to. The danger is exciting. Too good to resist.The what-ifs...What if he has a kind heart but just doesn’t show it?What if he’s sweet but doesn’t want to be vulnerable?What if it works out. He’s gonna change for me at some point?What if he’s just misunderstood? He’s not really mean. He’s just straightforward.Yeah, right.You’ve justified and defended them even though everyone can see that we’re only blinded by infatuation.Or maybe because we’re good, and that’s what we automatically see or want to see in others.We don't see the world as it is; we see it as we are. - Anaïs NinWe risk anything for what we believe is love. We make silly decisions that we know we’ll regret in the end. Sometimes we get the happily ever after we dream of. Other times we fail.I love this quote from Gilmore Girls:I mean, you have your morals, standards, and good common sense, and then, bam, you meet some guy, and all that goes right out the window. For every good woman, there's a dirty little wolf ready to lead her astray! You can't help it. He's got the eyes, the chin, and chest hair you could carpet your dining room with. I mean, what's a woman to do? We're not made of steel, for God's sake! Take good care of yourself. And don't be embarrassed Toots! This has happened to all of us. It’s happened even to the best of us.What’s important is that, in the end, we learn a valuable lesson from every failed relationship.Especially from our experience hanging around with the guy your mother warned you about.Women may choose bad boys initially, but they will always strive to bring out the excellent guy in them. Because the truth is, women may like to mess around with the bad boys, but deep down, they know it’s still better to marry the nice guy.
Fashion & Style That Dresslink Wishlist Came True 5:00 PM That Dresslink wishlist I had? It came true. A few days ago, I got my package. You see, it's fairly easy to shop at Dresslink. (1) Register here. (2) Choose the item you want. They're organized by categories (What's New, Special Offers, Baby's & Kids, Women, etc.). When you hover on each tab, you'll see that some have subcategories. Women for example has dresses, tees, shawls and the like. (3) Browse and choose. You can easily see the reviews of previous customers, the price, and the ietm description. (4) Click the item and choose your size, color choice, quantity. (5) You may opt to Buy It Now or Add To Cart. You may even create your own Wishlist if you're still undecided and go back to finalize your orders later. (6) Choose your payment method. There are several ways and the number of days the items will arrive is indicated on each method. That's it. The Verdict The items were inside a resealable plastic bag packed individually. Here they are straight outta packaging. Don't expect optimum quality as they're not expensive to begin with. But I'm not saying the products aren't good. For me they are priced right given the quality of the items. Just to set your expectations though, the dress came with these (like extra threads) on both sleeves and back. May not be the case for all dresses. No biggie. Nothing a pair of scissors can't solve. Amaryt? ^_^ Korea Ladies Women O-neck Short Sleeve Loose Varieties Of Style Dress Of Your Choice I'm Asian petite so this is how the dress fits me. You may wear it with a belt. [necklace and shoes: my own] New Fashion Women's Golden Chain Envelope Purse Clutch Synthetic Leather Handbag Shoulder Bag Dinner Party The keywords here are "dinner party". There's only enough space for your phone, cards or wallet, car key, a few beauty essentials and whatnot. It's elegant looking so I like it. New Women's Warm Winter Skinny Slim Leggings Stretch Pants Thick Footless Tights It's ideal for cold weather because they really are warm and thick. It fits me perfectly. [shoes and accessories: my own, top: my sister's :)] Women Fashion Jeggings Stretch Skinny Leggings Tights Pencil Pants Casual Snowflake Pattern Jeans We hear jeggings and we think it's jeans that's extra stretchable and comfortable like leggings. But this one's actually leggings that looks like jeans. I already know that prior to ordering because I've read it on the customer reviews section. It really does look like jeans when you wear it. That's what I like about it. [top and shoes: my own] Fashion Ladies Women Sequin Decoration O-neck Short Sleeve Patchwork Casual T-shirt This shirt is not cotton material and it's almost see through. The size (medium) is smaller than we expected as it's exactly my fit and I'm normally size small with shirts. I think if you want to buy this, you consider a size larger just to be on the safe side. [in photo: my sister] That's it for my wishes. It's been fun for me. I hope you'll have fun too. Tell me about it, yeah?
