Lux Thinking Aloud


12:12 AM

Life In The Time Of Coronavirus Lockdown Diary Day 35: Loss

I looked at the photo of the body bag my sister sent and I was at a loss for words. How can someone I used to see alive, laughing and talking be in that body bag now? It's beyond me.

My aunt died today. She's been sick and weak for more than a year now.

Still, I grew up with her around and it's hard to imagine a world without her. 

Don't you feel that about someone? You know we all die eventually but when they're a constant presence in your life, you feel like they will always be there. Their loss brings shock and pain.


If 2020 is a person, it will be Dolores Umbridge. A heartless bitch who doesn't seem to run out of evil ideas and was born to spread injustice and hostility. 

Dolores Umbridge gif

My other aunt (the sister of the one who just died) passed away last March. 

I'm still trying to wrap my head around not seeing her anymore whenever I go visit home and here I am mourning another death.

Every day they see each other when they were alive. Maybe she took her sister's death too hard. 

Because when my cousin watching her stepped out of the hospital room, she removed the tubes that were helping her breathe.

The last time I saw her was at the funeral of my other aunt.

Since we are in the time of c oronavirus and in l ockdown, we will not be able to pay our last respect. No wake. No funeral. She will be cremated.

May the Lord grant her soul eternal repose.

He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death 
or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever. 
-Revelation 21:4

Lost of freedom of speech

I don't want to make this political but today, a big network was ordered by the government to shut down. It's the same network that was closed during the Martial Law.

It's scary what is going on right now. The virus is not the only thing we need to be cautious about.


What's going to happen next? 

The future is uncertain and scary. I especially feel sorry for the 11,000 employees and the people who relies on them.

People are getting retrenched left and right and yet the government had the audacity to add 11,000 more to the statistics. 

In the middle of the p andemic? Really?

While illegal Chinese workers flock and seem untouchable?


At a time like this, here's the verse I'm holding on to:

The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you; 
He will never leave you nor forsake you
Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. 
-Deuteronomy 31:8

Please pray for my aunt's soul.
Please pray that the evil plans of some people will not succeed.
Pray for where you are for when it prospers, you will prosper too.

Your turn

How do you deal with loss?

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