To The Girl Who Always Gets Dumped

4:23 PM

Show me a woman who has never had her heart broken,
and I'll show you a woman who has never really lived.

To the girl who always gets dumped,

I know what you're thinking. 
That you're not pretty enough to hold his attention.
Or you're not smart enough to keep him interested.
Or you're not hot enough to keep him hooked.

But, you're wrong.

You are lovely. And you are enough.

It's not your fault that he is not content. He never was and he never will be.
It's not your fault that he is superficial. You are better off.

It's not your fault that he couldn't see your worth. That doesn't change who you are.

You deserve more than what he's giving you; his spare time, his leftover feelings, his insincere affection.

If you only matter to him when he needs something from you,
If he's only available when his friends aren't around,
If he cares about his happiness more than your well-being...

Girl, you're better off.

You're better off than being used, being cheated on, being lied to and  hurt in any way.
You are better off alone and at peace, than with someone but carrying a heavy useless burden in your heart.

No, you don't deserve his insults. 
No, you don't deserve his slaps, or kicks or punches.
No, you don't deserve his vilification, condescension, and downplaying.
No, you don't deserve to be played and cheated on.

To the girl who always gets dumped,

You deserve joy.
You deserve affection.
You deserve undivided attention when you talk.
You deserve unceasing loyalty.
You deserve to be honored and cherished.
You deserve true love.

You deserve to be treated with respect and adoration.
You deserve to be treated like a princess.
Because you are.

Aren't you the King's daughter?

You have been lied to far too many times that you may have started to believe it. And lived the way you were told to.

To the girl who always gets dumped,
Find yourself again. 
Find your beautiful, precious, love-worthy self.

Take your identity back.

Let go of your trashy past. It already happened. Stop holding on to it.

Forget about your vampires or Dementors.

Remember that you are loved and your value does not diminish despite the number of mistakes you did in the past.

Remember that your past does not define your future. (Bo Sanchez)

Remember that as cliche as it may sound, it's their loss and not yours.

To the girl who always gets dumped,
It's not your destiny to be ditched, so stop believing that's how you should be treated.

You were born a victor. You were made for greatness. You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Go and fall in love again. But this time, love yourself first. Give to yourself first. Most of all, forgive yourself.

For it's not your fault that you loved more, you loved sincerely, and that you believed in the goodness of men, even those who weren't good to you.

It's not your fault that you believe in love in a world full of doubts. That you are genuine in a world full of fakes.

Stay real, be wiser, and be more careful in who you're giving your heart to.

Someone out there is waiting to give you all that you deserve. 

The puzzle will soon be complete, and you will see what a beautiful picture you have been a part of.

One day, your heart will be whole again. And on that day, it will all make perfect sense.

For now, enjoy the journey. Laugh at your boo boos. Feel your pain, and then let go.

Step out and see the world waiting for you to take it on.

To the girl who always gets dumped, you are beautiful. You deserve to be loved. Remember that.

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  1. Love this so much!

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  2. To the girl who always gets dumped, I agree that it's not our fault that people couldn't see our worth, and that doesn't change who we are. And like you always say, kill them with kindness!

  3. This was beautiful Lux... I know every girl who has been dumped feels that way about herself... it's not easy to make those changes and believe in yourself but you are right, we need to remember we are more than enough xox <3

  4. OMG. Nice post. :) I like your previous blogposts too. Very personal that I can relate.


  5. Lovely post dear! Have a great week! xx

  6. So many of us women have such low self esteem that we feel we deserve to be abused. Instead, we should love ourselves,and know that we have worth. Well done.

  7. I've been this girl!! There is someone out there for you and you definitely deserve that someone!

  8. That's a lovely post and oh-so-true.

  9. You are so amazingly positive. Beautifully penned. Have an amazing week.

  10. Very encouraging post for girls and also this can apply to anyone. Letting go of trashy past is something I try to work on all the time. Often it's hard but important to move on!

  11. I just loved reading this!!
    Amazing words and so powerful!
    Thanks for the inspiration :D

  12. Hi, Lux!

    Nice piece, dear friend! No woman should let herself become a doormat. To me one of the most fundamental principles brought to light in this post is the following:

    "If you only matter to him when he needs something from you"

    That rule applies not only to romantic love relationships but to family relationships and friendships as well. It is a reliable method that can be used to gauge the quality of a relationship. It stands to reason that if someone really cares about you they will naturally gravitate to you and enjoy spending a lot of time with you. They won't spend the bulk of their time hanging out in bars with guy friends and mixing and mingling with other women. A family member who genuinely cares about you frequently picks up the phone and calls you just to find out how you are doing, not to ask for help or money. A committed friend might take the time to write you a snail mail letter or send you a greeting card - a real paper stock card, not an electronic one - just because they care about you and value the relationship - not because they have an ulterior motive in mind.

    The first step for all of us is to be the best version of ourselves that we can possibly be. Work on all aspects of yourself, mentally and physically, and then present yourself to the world. Next - don't settle for less than you deserve. There are "too many fish in the sea." Whoever you are, whatever your interests, whatever your physical attributes or limitations, there are people, many people, who will naturally like your style and would be a good match for you. The challenge is to be patient enough to find those people.

    Enjoy the rest of your week, dear friend Luxie!

  13. Awww I absolutely needed that!!! This was just awesome! I'll keep believing and loving myself in the process!

    Jasmine :)

  14. Thank you for this reminder! This actually reminded me so much of one of my closest friends. She would often think something is wrong with her because we are not that young anymore and she has never had a boyfriend before. I would always tell her there is nothing wrong with her and that it doesn't matter whether she has a boyfriend or not. She is successful in other aspects of her life and a man should not define her. Yes, it is nice to have a partner but that is not all there is to life. She is great the way she is.

    I should let her read this. Thank you! :)

    The Pink Lemonade Girl

  15. Yes! The King's daughter deserves so much love. Thank you for this, Lux :). I made some terrible choices in my younger years but am thankful to be married to someone who treats me with the utmost love and respect that I deserve.

  16. Absolutely beautiful! Aren't we daughters of the King?? :)

  17. Great post! Believe in yourself.

  18. Such beautiful, inspiring, and encouraging words, girlie; thank you for sharing and I hope you have a lovely week!



  19. Very true, far better out there. Don't dwell and keep on pushing on.

  20. Well said, Lux. :) And, so thankful God deeply loves us, even when we feel unlovable to others. ((Hug))

  21. This seems kinda sad story but amazing writing I should say.

  22. Thanks a lot, Lux, for your wonderful words...

  23. You are always worth it so believe in yourself.

  24. gorgeous post dear, very lovely
    new outfit <<< Fishnet trend >>>
    have an happy day, kisses

  25. Lovely. I especially appreciate your advice that you have to love yourself first.

  26. Amen to that. Of course it's always easier said then done when it comes to believing ones worth during break ups but there comes a time when acceptance and clarity reigns and it is the best feeling in the world


  27. This was a challenging read, Lux. So hard to live through rejection and come out of it with self-image intact, but then, it's a good indicator of where we've placed our trust. Thanks for writing words from the heart.

  28. I have been married for almost 3 years now, but I still wrestle with some of the lies I told myself about myself as a young woman with a broken heart. Thank you for speaking the truth!

  29. What a beautiful reminder that is, Lux. We need such reminders from time to time even when we know we are more than what they think we are. There is so much emotional and mental abuse going in in the world today inspite of all the rhetoric about it we can do little lese but hope people are going to change. Women need to think, feel and act strong enough to discard people who make them feel less in any way. I loved your powerful piece of writing! More power to your pen.

  30. In forwarding this post to my sister. Right now. Baci, Valeria - Coco et La vie en rose FASHION & BEAUTY

  31. Great post! It's so important that our worth is based on what God thinks about us rather than how others treat us.

  32. Lovely! Times have changed though. These days, the fairer sex can get along jolly well without a man in their lives, no need to suffer if there isn't anyone worth their love.

  33. Thanks for sharing your heart at Literacy Musing Mondays. So blessed to have a husband who loves me unconditionally even when I'm not so princessy. ;)

  34. So true! I would rather be single than with some one who was a douche bag. Visiting via #FridayReflections

  35. Yours is a powerful message that needs to be heard by all women.

  36. What about the guy who gets dumped? The mother who gets dumped? We all get dumped at some time or the other. We just have to pick up the pieces and move on.

  37. Dear Lux, I love this post. Your genuine, caring, and positive suggestions are uplifting, not only for ladies, but any person who has been rejected. Be well and have a wonderful week ahead my friend!

  38. Wise words. Thank you for sharing your encouragement. Hope you have an amazing week :)

  39. I love this post - it's all so true. You can feel so down but, really, it's only ever their loss. They're just freeing you up to meet someone you can truly be happy with. x

  40. Read this before but it is soooo good and right on. Everything you said - I say yes to. Happy Day Lux. You are amazing.

  41. Men have their heart broken too,he!he!