Life Lessons

Things To Leave in 2013

5:39 PM

You can't cling to the past, because no matter how tightly you hold on, 
it's already gone.  
--- How I Met Your Mother

Ever since I stumbled upon The Single Woman's Twitter account which led me to the The Single Woman blog, I've always been a fan of Mandy Hale. I was in a toxic relationship then and her words always brought me wisdom and encouragement.  I could easily relate to her stories, and sometimes I even feel like I'm reading my own thoughts and stories in her blog!

So, when I saw her posting Things To Leave in 2013, I got inspired and thought of my own list.

Things To Leave in 2013

(1)  People you consider as friends but who can't stay true to your face. Yes, there are people whom you can say are really good to you, they were there when you needed them the most and when you've got nothing, and friends you can share good times with.

Unfortunately, somewhere along the way, they started to distance themselves from you and your woman instinct kicks in and tells you something's wrong.  You know because the conversation started to become casual and the topics limited (they keep you in the dark), the warm welcome turned cold and you hear them whisper and exchange knowing looks when they thought you're not aware.

Needless to say, to continue the friendship is like trying to wear the clothes you've outgrown.  No matter how much you like it, it just doesn't fit anymore.  It's time to leave.  So leave, you must.  

(2)  Toxic and petty people.  You don't have to hang out with the wrong crowd.  Jesus may have succeeded in converting what the society considered as outcasts but let's face it.  In real life, more often than not, the more you try to fix people, the more they destroy you.  I've noticed that the more I try to reach out to difficult people, try to understand them and make their lives better, the more disappointed and exhausted I become.  

Bo Sanchez said you may love difficult people from a distance, but you don't have to spend time with them.  They will just suck your energy out and leave you drained.

(3)  Bitterness.  Bitterness leaves you feeling bad about yourself, makes you overlook the blessings around you and makes you wish ill towards another.  There's no sense in feeling bitter about the past because it's over.  And as appealing as plotting your vindication is, only God can really give you back what you've lost.  

(4)  "Unforgiveness".  Life is too short to spend hating.  "Unforgiveness is like drinking poison while waiting for the other person to die".  It will harm your body and spirit and will steal your joy.

(5)  Worrying over baseless things.  Worry is another huge "joy-stealer".  Instead of worrying, spend your time and energy wishing (and planning).  Even the Bible keeps on reminding us that we need not worry.  We just need to trust.

(6)  Habits and activities that do not nourish.  It takes 28 days to form a habit.  So you need to be patient with yourself.  You have to take it one day at a time.  Start getting a healthy sleeping pattern, stop munching on unhealthy food, stop engaging in gossips.  These are just a few unnecessary habits that we must not bring with us in the next year.   Easier said than done, but not impossible to do.

(7)  The could-have-been.  It's never too late to be who you might have been.  Yes, there are words better left unspoken.  There are things we wished we could have done better.  But, if it's over, let it go. The best way to avoid regrets is to start acting now and be what you've always wished to be or do what you've always wanted to do.  Every new day is an opportunity to start over.

(8)  Fears and what if's.  The only person stopping you is yourself.  Do it afraid.

(9)  Unnecessary spending.  Do something today that your future self will thank you for---save and invest.

(10)  Your past, obviously.  Leave 2013 to 2013 and welcome 2014 with open arms.

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