Guest Blogger

8 Ways Mutual Understanding Builds A Successful Marriage

4:52 PM

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It is not always easy to understand your partner’s thoughts or actions. Yet, learning to understand one another is key for a happy, healthy relationship.

Understanding, in some ways, is just as important as love - maybe even more so. Understanding helps you relate to one another, resolve conflict, display patience, and even helps you parent your children more effectively as a couple.

How well do you know your spouse? 

Understanding your partner and practicing healthy communication in relationships are essential qualities for building a successful marriage. Here are the best tips for getting to know your spouse better and building a solid foundation for marriage. 

8 Ways Mutual Understanding
Builds a Successful Marriage

1. Be Willing to Understand

Connecting with a partner is a unique and special experience. Couples benefit when they spend quality time together and put in the effort to understand one another on a deeper level. So, the thought that you may not want to understand your partner better may sound strange. But, the truth is, many people are set in their ways.

Fight against a potentially stubborn spirit and seek to understand your partner on a deeper level. This will benefit nearly every aspect of your relationship from communication to your sex life. 

2. Become Skilled at Conflict Resolution

Part of healthy communication in relationships involves knowing how to resolve a conflict. Do not interrupt each other. Give your partner time to speak and learn to listen to what they are saying. Keeping in mind that true conflict resolution is about solving a problem, not seeing who can shout the loudest.

Be civil. Do not resort to name-calling or freezing the other person out for days just because you don't agree with them.

Have empathy. Where is your partner coming from? Why do they feel this way? Understanding your partner is key to a healthy marriage.

Be humble. We have the tendency to think we are always right when it comes to marital arguments. This is (unfortunately!) not true. Having humility will help resolve conflicts quickly and will encourage partners to be modest in mind, not arrogant or prideful.

Seek to solve. As stated above, couples should go into disagreements with a view to finding a solution to their issues, not for the sake of arguing or berating one another. 

3. Be Honest with Each Other

It is not always easy to be honest with your spouse. This is especially true when issues arise in the relationship or the bedroom.

In fact, couples are so squeamish when it comes to talking about sex that studies reveal they would rather talk about literally anything else - finances, children, weight.

But, in order to have a successful marriage, couples must learn healthy communication in relationships. And healthy communication is all about understanding your partner and learning to talk honestly about your problems. 

4. Spend Quality Time Together

One of the best ways to strengthen communication in relationships is to spend more time together.

Studies show that having a regular date night can actually help improve communication.

Set aside one evening each week where you focus on dating your spouse. Go out to a fancy dinner, explore a local museum, or go for a romantic walk through a scenic trail.

Making a habit of a romantic date night will help improve marital friendship, boost communication, and works wonders for reigniting your libidos. 

5. Ask for Information

Ask open-ended questions. If you’re not asking about your spouse, how will you ever get to know them on a deeper level?

Talk about children, money, and sex. Or discuss your futures, goals, and dreams.

Couples should be able to discuss any topic under the sun with your spouse without the fear of being judged.

If you’re not putting in the effort to get to know your partner, you’ll never be able to understand where they are coming from. 

6. Discuss Your Life Goals

Where do you see your future heading? It may surprise you to know that couples aren’t always on the same page about this – even married couples.

Talk about your financial future. What are your goals? Do you want to buy a house, start a business, or save for travel? 

Discuss family-planning. Do you and your spouse want to have children? If so, when?

Share personal goals. Understanding your partner better is all about learning what makes them tick. Are they working toward personal goals of getting healthier or breaking a certain habit?

Talking about your shared goals in life can help improve communication in relationships. 

7. Get to Know Your Love Languages

Dr. Gary Chapman believes that there are five love languages that every couple should know about.

  • Words of affirmation. Verbalizing your love for one another.
  • Acts of service. For people who believe actions speak louder than words.
  • Receiving gifts. Sweet gestures that make partner feel loved and thought of.
  • Quality time. Giving the most precious and irreplaceable thing in the world, your time.
  • Physical touch. Studies show that sexual satisfaction and physical touch predicated heighten emotional intimacy in couples. There are also many other benefits of touch and physical intimacy in marriage, such as stress reduction and relationship satisfaction
Learning your partner’s love language will help you better understand how to communicate your love to them. 

8. Continue Getting to Know Your Spouse

Getting married does not mean that is the end of getting to know your partner. You may think that you had a good idea of who your spouse was when you got engaged. The reality is that no matter how long you have been together, you should never stop trying to get to know your spouse.

Have regular "relationship check-ups" to ensure happiness is being met. 

Try new things together. Studies show couples who have shared activities and hobbies are happier in their relationship.

Exercise together. Working out reduces stress and promotes teamwork.

Spend time with each other's friends. Research reveals that couples who do are more likely to have a successful marriage.

Understanding your partner and learning how to communicate properly are the biggest tips for a successful marriage. Practice honesty, discuss your life goals, and spend quality time together regularly. Once you learn how to talk to your spouse, the rest of your lives should be smooth sailing.

Author Bio: 
female author sylvia smith
Sylvia Smith is a writer who likes to write about relationships and how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. She is currently associated with She is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt its principles in their relationships. By taking purposeful and intentional action, Sylvia feels any relationship or marriage can be transformed and truly enjoyed. 

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  1. Great tips! I especially like the part where different examples were given- like exercise together and reduce stress. Thanks for sharing. :)