Books

How To Talk To A Widower: A Book Review

10:57 AM

How To Talk To A Widower: A Book Review
We read to know we're not alone
-William Nicholson



There are friends who can finish each others sentences. 

Friends who know exactly what you’re thinking by merely looking at you. Friends who understand how you’re feeling without you explaining anything. That’s the kind of friendship I share with How to Talk to a Widower.  

It’s a book. Ha-ha. I bought it last 2011 on sale (from Php525 to a whopping Php50. Hah!) but I couldn’t find the time to read it. I was swamped juggling three jobs, making plans and well pursuing another dream. I went dating again after two years of not seeing anyone new so you can say sitting down to read a novel was not in my to-do list. 

Well, I quit all three jobs, the dating didn’t really work out and several things happened after that. So one ordinary day I found myself reading How to Talk to a Widower.

I think the timing was impeccable. I think this is exactly the right time for me to read it. Like the universe already knew I will need this good read someday, two years after I bought it.  

I felt like a found a soul mate in Doug, the widower in the story.

No, I didn’t lose a spouse as I’m not even married yet. I admire his frailty. He grieved because he has to. He didn’t like the shallowness from the people around him. He loved Hailey with all his heart.

What captured my heart is this:

I know exactly what it means to act as normal as possible for the world to see. I know how hard it is to hold on to something you used to have but isn’t there anymore.  

I know how awful it is to deal with something that happened so abruptly, so sudden, and how cruel it is that the world would not even give you enough time to let it sink in first before it goes on. 

I know how crazy it is to get pissed and then feel guilty about getting pissed and then get pissed about feeling guilty.  

I know how difficult it is to cry yourself to sleep, wake up without feeling the purpose of waking up anymore but getting up anyway and showing the world you're still okay. 

I just know how messed up Doug felt and I’m glad that he made me realize I’m not alone, even if he’s just a fictional character.

If you like how “informal” and raw Catcher in the Rye is, I think you’ll like How to Talk to a Widower too.

It’s hilarious but poignant. It’s unpretentious, realistic and easy to relate with. It’s very human.

The characters are ordinary and flawed. Their relationships are dysfunctional and well, normal.

It doesn’t have a happily ever after ending and that’s the other beautiful thing about it. The story goes on.  

Doug moves on but he takes his sweet time. Hailey, his deceased wife, will always be a part of him.

The way he refuses to forget about her even after over a year made me wish I have a Doug too. Even when women throw themselves at him, he remains loyal to her memory. Yes he dated again and even so humanly and irrationally jumped into something he shouldn’t have but at the end of the day, it’s still Hailey.

Laughing and grieving with Doug was a refreshing experience. I felt alive…and normal again.

Rating:

Perfect 5



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6 comments

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  1. Hi, this sounds like a sweet story. Thanks for sharing on Book Musing Mondays.

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  2. Sounds very interesting, and I love that the universe planned for you to read it 4 years after you bought it! Visiting from Mary's linkup

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  3. will have to look into this book, thanks for sharing. I'm always looking for more books to read.

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  4. Intriguing premise! Thanks for sharing.
    Jan (visiting from Ashley's linkup)

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  5. Hi,
    1. My husband was a widower. Extremely insightful and realistic writing.
    2. Catcher in the Rye was my favorite book of all time not sci fi. A tie with ...Mockingbird
    3. I met you at the Literary Musings Linky.
    Very insightful writing!
    Janice

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  6. I do like informal and raw books. I'll check this out.

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